Do you ever have thoughts about what it would be like to not be who you are?
Sometimes I wish I couldn’t see through peoples smoke and mirrors.
Much like some imagine themselves with no tattoos, I imagine seeing and hearing what people say instead of the behind the scenes of it.
Then filtering what I am hearing through the 7 essene mirrors so that I have compassion for where people are at can be tiring too.
This is why I am protective of my space.
This is why I do choose who I spend time with or have in my inner circle.
Because being all of this also doesn’t mean having no boundaries.
I give a lot of chances. I’ve been told way too many in the past.
I hear truths and have still let people stay in my life because I didn’t want to seem judgy or mean.
But discernment is not a wrong feeling. Accountability in who people say they are isn’t something that is wrong either.
And once I’m done, I’m done.
Knowing who is an energy that impacts me in a positive way and who isn’t, is a skill I’ve learnt to master.
Knowing when it came from wounding and when it was legit.
So many of us keep people around because we don’t want to upset them. Because we don’t want to add to their pain or suffering. Because we want to be known as the loving, caring one.
Often putting our intuition and feelings aside so that we can hold onto that persona.
Personally I can get along with pretty much anyone. For short periods of time. All my life I’ve had friends from all different friend groups.
It’s only as I have grown older that I’ve realised just because I can get along with everyone doesn’t mean I need to have them all up in my personal space.
Again, I am very protective of my space.
I used to think this made me a bitch.
Now I know that I no longer fear being disliked.
When you know the person you are, there is no need to rank your value based on who desires to have you in their life.
So my tips to stay true to who you are:
1: Listen to that gut instinct. Sometimes someone else will absolutely adore a person but you might get an icky feeling about them, don’t second guess yourself.
2: Share exactly how you feel about things rather than staying quiet or pretending to like something. This will only confirm your beliefs that you aren’t good enough if you keep being untrue to yourself.
3: Know that having boundaries about behavior you will not accept in your space does not make you any less loving than you actually are, in fact it makes you more loving, to yourself, let alone anyone else.
4: Anyone who doesn’t want you in their life for speaking your honest truth is not your person. Learn how to communicate your needs thoroughly so that your truth doesn’t end up being an attack on the other person.
5: Work your trust muscles with yourself so that you can truly connect in with those instincts and learn to trust them. Know that you may get it wrong sometimes too and that is perfectly ok.
Staying true to yourself is a skill that is not taught. From the day we are born we are shown how to fit in rather than stand out.
Fitting in meant safety. But we aren’t living in caves hiding from dangerous animals anymore.
It’s ok to be different.