When I hear people say they can’t feel my husband because he doesn’t share his deepest feelings on Facebook it only tells me how little they actually know him.
If you were at our vow renewal last year you know exactly what im talking about.
You can see a small snippet via the photos even. And if you read our wedding vows that I posted here on my blog you will definitely get a glimpse into his heart.
I laugh because after 15 years together I’ve seen him pendulum between being the unemotional robot functioning day to day to get by…
And the other way, to the overemotional feel everything and can’t function day to day at all.
And now I’ve seen him come into balance.
That seems to trigger people who are at either end of the spectrum, even though they believe they are balanced.
They often don’t know how to approach him because he is direct in how he communicates and in a spiritual culture that tells men to be softer they think he is hard because of it.
It turns me the f on to see him sharing powerfully and honestly and being open to everyone’s comments and having dialogue with them.
If he sees something or feels something he will speak with you. He doesn’t need to beat around the bush to say what he wants. He doesn’t need to speak with a million other people and get a million other voices in his head.
He doesn’t just delete and block or ignore because it doesn’t align with what he thinks.
And he doesn’t need to partake in childish backhanded comments either.
You will always know where you stand with him if he is in your life. There is no second guessing or games.
While you see posts aimed at one side or the other of the spectrum – remember there is a middle ground.
And THAT is the actual ideal place.
And wherever people are on their journey on the pendulum ride I trust that they will find their way back to the middle with a lot of knowledge and tools to help them stay in balance.
If they choose to find them and cultivate them and use them in their lives.
I’ve owned businesses, I’ve done the single mum thing, I’ve done the masculine provider role, there isn’t many places I’ve not played in throughout my life.
And people in my life that I admire and turn to have spoken numerous times into feeling that I’m a very healthy balance between my masculine and feminine.
Which in my eyes is I am in my feminine but can call on the structure when I need to but I don’t live there.
It’s a nice place to be in.
And right now I feel turned the f on and more woman than I ever have.
And it has nothing to do with the roles I’m playing and everything to do with the feelings I’m feeling.
And my husband is a part of that.
And no he doesn’t need to share everything on social media to appease his followers. Just because everyone else may share does not mean he has to.
Our most private things are for us and we don’t need to have a video recording to prove how amazing we are.